I am vaccinated!

Shot was easy-breezy, although I am feeling pretty nauseaous at the moment, and my arm is throbbing a bit. Wonder if that's just a side-effect? Anyways this doc said 4 weeks of waiting after made him a little nervous, he'd feel better about 6. I don't think he knew at all though. The CDC and American Pregnancy Association both say 4 weeks. I have sent this to info to Dr. A to see what he thinks. If he is unwilling to move up our IUI from May, Mr. deutschefairy and I have discussed that we will try on our own in March and April. So I just need to get through February :) March will be our anniversary and April is my birthday. The thought of maybe conceiving in one of those months has me excited and looking forward to the future. I know our chances are slim, but a girl can dream right?

Second blood work results

They came back the same :( I will get the vaccine on Friday. We will go from there on how long we have to avoid getting pregnant. My RE (Dr. A) says 3 months, but all the research I've done only says 4 weeks. I left a message for Dr. A on his thoughts and will ask the doc that gives me shot as well. I knew the results would come back the same, but right now it hurts all over again.

What I learned this weekend

-I am a sore loser. I cried like a baby after my Bears lost and wanted to crawl under a rock. When the heck did I become such a football fan?
-Even when my husband is out of town and we have the bed to ourselves, the dogs and I still sleep on the edge of my side.
-Holding a baby wasn't as sad as I thought it would be, but seeing her in her daddys arms, knowing I couldn't give that to my husband just yet, broke my heart.

I'm still anxiously awaiting the blood results, praying for a miracle. I hope it was just wrong. I'm trying to tell myself that since I have 1% chance of this being true, I have 99% chance that the first results were an error. Right?! If not, I do have the appointment set up to get the vaccine on Friday.

HSG: Good news and bad news

Well it's over. It sucked. It hurt. But it wasn't the worst thing I went though (today and in general).

My blood work came back normal on the hormone levels. That means the PCOS the doctor had suspected has been ruled that out. Yay! The HSG was pretty dang uncomfortable. Anyone who says it's a piece of cake, is a liar! My situation was a little tricky though so it's mainly because of that. The catheter was uncomfortable and the cramping was a little painful, but totally bearable. However, my uterus is SO tilted that the dye just came squirting back out and wouldn't go into the tubes. He tried a few times with no luck so he had to change to a balloon catheter and try again. That worked but hurt like crazy! I even cried out in pain once. Hubby got to go in there with a radiation suit so he immediately grabbed my hand. The rest was more pain, but it got the job done. My tubes are completely clear!! They are unusually long though, but he said that shouldn't matter. My uterus looks good, but he did say its a tiny one. 

Onto the BAD news....I have no immunity to the rubella virus (German measles) in my blood. Ironic considering I was born in Germany and had the measles there when I was younger. 99% of people who have it or get the immunization carry the lifetime immunity. So once again, I am fvcking special. I am the 1% exception. I've had the virus and I still don't carry it in my blood. WTH?! We are running a 2nd blood test to confirm, but I'm sure it will come back the same. I will need to get the vaccine, which means we cannot try to get pregnant for 3 months after. I'm hoping to get it done next week as long as the blood work to confirm comes back that fast. If I were to ignore this and I caught the measles during my pregnancy, our LO could be born deaf, among other disabilities. Chances of that happening aren't super high, but knowing this is obviously not a risk we are willing to take. We both work with children, who could have the virus, so it's just not something we can leave up to chance. 

I am trying to remember all the positives, but right now I am devastated. I have been through so much this last year including an unwanted 6 months of  not being able to try and now I have to do 3 more. Just when I thought we had a plan. All I want to do right now is cry. It's not fair. I'm trying to just focus on our new plan, which is figure out my ovulation (considering we still don't have an answer to the spotting), go back in April to make sure my blood work is normal (immunity-wise), and then do IUI (insemination) in May. 

So far 2011 sucks as well :(

This was a great weekend

I feel like I haven't been able to say that in a while...
Had a fantastic spa day with my sisters and girlfriend on Saturday. It was a much needed day of relaxing.
The Bears beat the Seahawks!!! Now we need to beat the Packers and then MY team will be in the Superbowl!
Hubby's team also won!!! Makes me happy because I like the Jets and I hate the Patriots.
Wouldn't it be awesome if our teams played in the Superbowl against eachother?
I hardly thought about the things I don't have so it was a great weekend!!
Two more days til my test. I am getting anxious!

It's time to start this blog!

Well after throwing a complete fit last night after someone stole a package from my doorstep, I figured it's best I start writing. It wasn't about the package, it was about everything else....I'm getting ahead of myself. Let me introduce myself. I was going to keep this totally confidential, but anyone who knows me would need about 2 seconds to figure out that this is my blog. So I am deutschefairy ;), a 30 year old woman, married to the football coach of her dreams, on a quest to become a mother.
A little background on why I chose the name. A lot of this blog will revolve around that so I need to explain. I have a strong love for football, sometimes I think just because I need to, but I do enjoy it....My husband coaches high school football so for about 7-8 months out of the year, we eat, sleep, breathe football! But mostly, I chose the name to symbolize me.
When I was born, I was diagnosed with a congenital heart defect known as Tetralogy of Fallot. TOF involves four heart defects: a large ventricular septal defect (VSD), pulmonary stenosis, right ventricular hypertrophy, and an overriding aorta. Woah right? So to keep it short, I had a shunt put in when I was 4 to pro-long needing the total repair (and a lovely scar from my back to my side) and then had the repair when I was 8 (and another lovely scar from the top of my chest to above my belly button).
Jump ahead to 2006 when I started dating one of my best friends. We were married in 2009 and started trying to conceive (TTC) right after. We literally threw the birth control out on our honeymoon. We had been trying for 9 months before I went to my OB with concerns. I won't get into any of that because that doc was a moron.
Two months later, my husband and I received the biggest shock. I went to my cardiologist check up and found out my pulmonary valve was leaking much more than it should be and my RVH had gotten worse. The right side of my heart had grown 3 times in size in 3 years. I needed to have pulmonary valve replacement soon and before we continued TTC or my child would not survive in the womb, and chances that I would survive pregnancy were not high. Talk about a shocker! Eight days after our first wedding anniversary, I had the surgery and became the owner of a brand new beautiful scar :)
While the pain of surgery was horrible and the recovery was a long, painful road, the emotional and mental let down of not being able to TTC was the hardest part. Having to take the 6 months off from trying was the most painful thing I've had to experience. All I have wanted since I met my husband was to become a mother. I was able to get through it with the help of my husband, my awesome family, a few close friends, and a board full of "strangers" (some of my closest friends).
So now here we are, almost 10 months after surgery, almost 21 months since we started to TTC, and on our 16th cycle of actually being able to try. We are still not pregnant.
On 12/29/10, we met with a specialist (an RE). We are finally on our way to becoming parents. 2010 may have been the worst year of our lives, but 2011 WILL be the best. We will become pregnant this year. I have faith in our doctor and I believe it will happen. I start with my HSG next week and I will enjoy the ride...